I died last night. It was quite an amazing experience. My only regret was not being able to tell all the people that I cared about on this plain how much they meant to me whilst I was here. They all flashed before me, like photographs in an album of memories, but they were unable to hear or see me. I could even recall all the wonderful times that we shared together, the way they touched my heart, the many amazing things they did on my behalf, yet I was still unable to thank them for their many kindnesses, their love and well placed concern at the most crucial and worrisome times of my life.
"Strange," I thought to myself rather amazed that I never thought to do that when I was alive and breathing amongst them. I mean, they must have known, right? Surely I had no need to express my feelings to them. What are friends and family for after all, if not to read each others minds without the need for words? Yet, if I was truly honest with myself, I should have done exactly that.
I mean, after all, how was my sister honestly expected to know how worried I was about her when she was having complications with her pregnancy a couple of weeks ago, unless I told her so? Or, how was my friend Gabriel ever to know how much I regarded him as the family I never had myself. How he was like my father, brother and best friend all rolled into one and then some. Was this really just a dream, or was I in fact really dead?
I felt my heart beat faster, my breath become sharper, and my body start to convulse in some sort of involuntary panic. Suddenly, I was back in school listening to my teacher telling me that the earth was about to be hit by an asteroid and that we would all be dead within the next ten minutes. Thankfully, he said, we can all make one last call to the person we love most, but have never told exactly how we feel. My mind was reeling; thoughts were spinning around in my head until I could no longer think straight. Ten minutes, one call.
One call to one person, who would I call and what could I possibly say that I had never said before? Would I even be able to get the words out properly? What if they were talking to someone else, perhaps the line would be busy, and would I even have time to place the call? Quickly now, the teacher kept pushing as he instructed us to write down exactly what we were going to say, just incase we forgot anything important. Then, just as suddenly, he informed us that the asteroid had missed earth by a matter of inches. A huge sigh of relief filled my body as if it had been emerged in water to the point were I had almost drowned.
Then he proceeded to ask us what we had written. Embarrassed we hid our notes from him, as we had all too often hidden our feelings to those that mattered most. Who was our last message to, he wondered? Even more important in his mind, was why we hadn't yet told them our important thoughts. Why indeed, I asked myself? Life really is far too short for regrets, especially when it comes to the people that matter most in our lives. So don't leave it to chance, don't wait until it is your time to go, for by then, you may have left it a little too late.
Tell the people you care for most in life how you feel about them right this very second. Don't worry if you have to wake them up to tell them. Just do it! For it could make all the difference in the world, and that's a promise!
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